Running

"Its so easy to run FROM God, but so hard to run TO God. I'm going to pray that God gives you that last bit of courage and passion to draw you right to the place where He wants you."

 I wrote these words to a friend tonight and God struck a cord in my heart.  "What are you running from child?  Why must you take the easy way when I've called you into the difficult?"

Talk about knock my breath away for a second!  I would never call my life easy, but what does God see that I don't?  Am I making decisions in life because they are easy or because they are what God wants me to do?  At the moment, I can't answer that question with a definitive answer.  

Philippians 2:5-8 (NKJV)  says this...

⁵ Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, ⁶ who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, ⁷ but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and⁸ And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. coming in the likeness of men.

This scripture was the first one I saw today and it was the one I needed.  Jesus was God in the flesh.  He knew all and was (and is) all powerful.   Jesus could have done anything He wanted while in the fleshly body.  Yet He chose to take the difficult path.  He chose to become a servant to man. And He chose to be obedient to the point of death on the cross.  It wasn't easy for Jesus to give up His will and lay it all down for us.  None of the suffering Jesus endured was easy or okay for him, yet He went through it anyway.

When I think of the suffering I've experienced, I should remember the suffering that Christ chose to go through for me.  It's honestly often hard for me to think that Jesus knew the kind of suffering I've experienced.  How did he know the emptiness of my arms?  How did he know what it's like to have a child die inside his body?  But when I really think about it, Jesus chose to live a life alone, without a helpmate, without a wife.  Jesus never knew the joy of holding his own flesh and blood in his arms.  I know the Bible doesn't mention his thoughts on this, but I do imagine that being human he felt the absence of that special family bond.  I know that He knew all our pains and I believe that He knows mine too.  When Jesus went to pray in the garden of Gethsemane, He prayed so hard that His sweat became as blood.  Can you imagine someone praying that hard for you?  To know that He was praying for the coming days and all of us is more than I can even comprehend.  It's no wonder that His whole body was affected.  While He was suffering being beaten, carrying that cross, and finally dying, I was on His mind.  All the pain and shame I've been through was on His mind.  My Jesus ran straight into the difficult and the impossible, not because He wanted to, but because He knew we needed Him to.  He not only became our salvation, but He showed the Way.

*taking a moment to let that sink in*

Lord,

  Examine my heart and mind.  Show me the Way....the way of Your plan, the way of my specific path.  Help me to run to You, God.  I'm much too weak and weary from this journey.  I feel my strength is almost gone. Be the strength and the courage I need.  Help me to put the easy way out of my mind. Give my heart the urgency I once had.  Return to me Lord the complete joy of my salvation.  I desire to see You vividly again. Forgive me for running in any direction other than You.  Thank you Lord for never leaving my side and awakening my spirit.  

In Jesus Name....AMEN

For anyone reading this, be blessed today and know that you have the power to choose which direction you'll run.  

~*Melody*~

Direction

Lord,
I need your divine direction in my life. There are so many things coming all at once at me. I know that You are in part of this, but Lord I want to be in those parts and only those parts. Help me to know what Your Will is for my life. I'm trying my best to make You my priority in these decisions. Right now Lord I feel so unsure of the way I should go. I don't like feeling like this and I know there's no confusion in You. Please help me to make the appropriate decisions and let me know that it is the right way for me.

In Jesus Name.....AMEN.

______________________________________

After posting my last entry, I had a personal sort of open-your-mouth-insert-foot moment. It turns out that the very thing I was talking about turned around. I've been presented with a couple of opportunities to do some actual ministry within our local church. One of them will include using my creativity to teach some summer classes to our women. I'm very excited about teaching these classes and have already began to put together the things I need for them.

The next ministry opportunity came unfortunately when some truths came to light about a former person in leadership. I have worked in this type of ministry before (please forgive my vagueness) and feel very comfortable working in it again. However, I'm very hesitant to jump back into it. I do fear that I will "get stuck" there. I'm extremely uncertain about taking on this ministry again.

I'm equally concerned about the amount of things I'm actively involved in. One of the biggest lessons I learned from my former church experience was to never take on more than you can handle. I spread myself so incredibly thin while at that other church that I was on the verge of burnout at all times. I didn't have any time for myself and my family life suffered because of that. I refuse to fall back into that trap. I know God delivered me for a reason and I can't willfully jump back into it.

There's also my personal life to consider. I've been working hard over the past few months to prepare for the summer selling season for my home business, Creative Radiance. As it is now before any new commitments, I only have a couple of free Saturdays to set up my shop. If I don't have time through the week, I won't be able to continue making things and won't be making any money. We desperately need for me to earn some income over the summer. I must consider this as well before making any decisions

Oi !
~*Melody*~