Please excuse the mess....blog under renovations !

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Back in Public View

I decided it was time to make my blog public again.  One of the reasons I decided to write in this blog was to journal my journey; my transitions if you will, being on private almost defeated the purpose.  I've taken time to heal from past events and am ready to move on.

My apologies to anyone who might have wondered what happened to me.   I'm still around and will be more active here now.  I have almost 2 weeks worth of Photo 365 to catch up with posting.  I have that on my schedule for this week. 

See ya then....
~*Melody*~

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Walking Down Memory Lane

Tonight I've been studying some for the middle school girls class I teach on Wednesday nights.  I was surfing the web for some resources to help me with the next series of lessons I'm teaching.  Such strange feelings go through me sometimes.  I pulled up my old Crossed Out Youth Ministries email account.  Crossed Out was the youth ministry that my husband and I pastored for 5 years.  I deleted its website several years ago, but I never could bring myself to delete the email account.  All youth related things are still directed there and there are so many memorable emails stored there; emails from students, parents, and fellow peers in youth ministry.

Anyway so I'm sitting here tonight and this feeling comes over me.  The only way I know how to describe it is an intense sudden sense of purpose.  The passion bubbles up so quickly within me and its so easy to go back into youth pastor mode.  Recently our youth pastor empowered all the youth leaders to act as youth pastors over their particular small group.  I'm not exactly sure I understand the logic behind that, but on one hand it does feel nice to have that kind of confidence behind us.

I know that God took RL and I out of youth pastorship for a reason.  I have yet to discover that reason and sometimes I greatly struggle with that.  But it's nights like tonight that reassure me that God has not taken my passion and zeal for youth away.  Albeit strange, I am thankful that God allows such feelings to flood my heart and mind.

ETA:  After I posted this the first time, I glanced up at today's scripture of the day...
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.” (James 1:2-3) ...... Thanks for that reminder Lord. I love you too.

~*Melody*~

BTW:  I'll be catching up with posting my Photo 365's in the next couple days.  I have taken them, but just haven't taken the time to blog them.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

This Is My Year !

I believe this is going to be my year.  I'm bound and determined like I haven't been in a long time.  This belly will be leaving me in the near future.  I have decided that I'll no longer be attached or defined by it.  It's going to take this determination to make it.  I will need help along the way so please do send those encouraging words.  I need every single one of them. 

Tonight I did a 20 minute ab workout on my exercise ball with a DVD.  It's a 45 minute routine, but I thought I'd start slow and try my best to keep up with the pro.  I did well keeping up, which I'm very happy about.  Hopefully soon I'll be able to get all the way through the video.  I did get to the harder part of the workout; ball pushups with pelvic tucks.  So at least I got past the basic crunches.  BTW, if you've never worked out on an exercise ball, I highly encourage you to get one or at least try it out at the gym.  They really help a lot in supporting your back and allow a broader range of motion.  I've gotten more success in the past through occasional ball workouts than I ever did with crunches. 

So here's my planned routine for the next few weeks:
  • Ab Workouts at least 3 days a week
  • Cardio and Weights at least 3 days a week
  • Running on the treadmill each weekday  (attempting this will depend on timing)
I have access to a small gym at my leisure.  It's very small and I'd have to bring my own entertainment, but at least its something.  I'd have to wait for my hubby to go with me because he's the one with the key, but I'm sure he'll help to encourage me.  There's WiFi so I'll probably take my laptop and pull up something on Netflix or Hulu to watch while on the equipment.  It'd be a great time for a good old podcast or two as well.  I'm not agile enough to knit while on the treadmill yet...boo. 

Maybe soon I'll get to buy some cute new workout clothes.  :-)  'Cause you know a girl always look for a good excuse to shop.  Plus I've got a Broadway-inspired Sweet Sixteen party to attend this coming summer.

~*Melody*~

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Photo 365: Day 13

Fun times in the library with Lou.

~*Melody*~

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Photo 365: Day 12


Photo 365: Day 12
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina

Out for a ride near my stepdad's property...goodness I could lost in that dreamy light. I wish I could have just stood out there for hours watching those horses and daydreaming.

~*Melody*~

P.S.  I'll post Day 11 soon.  It's a picture of a gift that the recipient had yet to see.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Photo 365: Day 11


Photo 365: Day 11
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina

The finished money hat I made for Grayson. I just think it's the cutest thing. I was inspired by the BlaBla brand and made my own. The hat is knit from cotton yarn and is lined with fleece. There's earflaps and a velcro strap there as well, you just can't see it in this picture.

~*Melody*~

Photo 365: Day 10


Photo 365: Day 10
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina

A view from my workspace today....I looking out my windows up toward the mountain covered in snow. Some days I face the other wall, but today the snow helped inspire me.
~*Melody*~

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Photo 365:Day 9


Photo 365:Day 9
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina
I'm so thankful for heat, hot water and unfrozen pipes.....eh and maybe even curly wet hair sometimes :-p
~*Melody*~

Photo 365: Day 8


Photo 365: Day 8
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina
Just after midnight before the snow came barreling down...I was too excited to sleep
~*Melody*~

Photo 365: Day 7


Photo 365: Day 7
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina
Snow makes me one happy lady.
~*Melody*~

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Photo 365: Day 6


Photo 365: Day 6
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina
I looked so forward to purchasing this circle cutter...came home to try it out to find it doesn't work at all....BOO !!!

Photo 365: Day 5


Photo 365: Day 5
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina
The beginnings of my yarn destashing....oi I have a lot of work ahead of me.

Photo 365: Day 4


Photo 365: Day 4
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina
His own kinda style...gotta love the combat boots and pjs.

Photo 365 : Day 3


Photo 365 : Day 3
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina

Homemade Pizza? - Hubby was so proud of his pizza creation, cause I was still to sick to cook.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

2010 Goals

I'm a few days behind in getting my goals posted for 2010.  I went on a youth trip on 12-29 and returned early on 12-31 due to a sudden illness.  I won't go into all the details, but let's just say that absolutely nothing would stay down and I went downhill quickly.  I'm still not well and have barely held anything down since Wednesday.  I suspect I picked up a nasty stomach virus while on the trip.  I'm just glad that it appears no one else came down with the virus.  I'd rather be sick than have a child get sick.

Christmas 2009 came and went by so fast.  I didn't have much time to really enjoy it because I was so busy working on gifts and all the details.  I want this to be different in 2010.  So that leads me to goals for 2010.

Personal
1. Live life in the today.
I spend way too much time living for what's coming next that life seems to just pass by without me really even noticing.  It's time to change that.

2.  Enjoy life more.
This goes hand in hand with the first one.  Life is too short not to enjoy it.

3.  Finish things I've started.
I'm tired of leaving things so unfinished.  I want to set reasonable goals and bring them to completion to the best of my ability this year.

4.  Continue to allow myself to be human.
I've been working on this the past couple years.  It's all part of my transitions theme.  I allow myself the right to succeed and fail, simultaneously.  I allow myself to feel.  I allow myself to have human emotion, reactions, non-reactions, etc without guilt.

Creatively
1.  Do the Photo 365 Project.
I know a lot of people are doing this.  I was inspired to do this in October when I stumbled upon a blog about letting go.  I'll likely be posting a weekly or bi-weekly posting of my photos.  I don't plan to do any themes (unless I change my mind). My main goal is document my everyday life.  I'll be using my Flickr account to do this (and of course blogging too).

2.  Take more photos in general.
I'm guilty of letting months go by and not picking up my camera.  I'd like to change that for 2010.  I once had a deep passion for photography and I let that go by the wayside.  It's time to live again.

3.  Actively look at my personal style and attempt to find it.
I'm going to try several methods including an inspiration journal and participating in some online style forums.

4.  Just go for it ! Designing, Writing, Drawing, Painting.....Anything that comes to mind !
I want to fill up the sketch book that I carry around.  In fact, I might have to buy 2 or 3 this year!  I'm not going to hold back.  No fear, no shame.

5.  Use up as many supplies as I possibly can.
I want to completely declutter and de-stash my craft studio.

6.  Make my craft studio creatively inspiring instead of just functional.
This could should be fun !

7.  Knit myself a sweater !
I've made several for others, but none for myself.  It's time I can wear some of my own lovely handknits.

Health-wise

1.  Stay active.
I have a horrible habit of being active for a while and then having setbacks.  I'd like to be as active as possible.

2.  Loose the first 50 pounds.
I've decided that I want to loose the first 50 pounds before we actively begin trying for a baby again.  For my health and the health of the child, I believe it will be best.  This is a very hard decision because it means that we'll be loosing several months of time trying.  I'll need lots of encouragement with this one.

3.  Continue the natural treatments.
The natural way is still working for us and I couldn't be more happy about that.  I do need to find a doctor that will be ok with our natural choices.

4. Organic Gardening
I'm excited about our spring/summer plans for organic gardening.  I'm looking forward to the fruits of our labor.

Spiritually

1.  Read the Word more.
I'm committing to reading the Word more along with my sisters in Christ at our group forum.

2.  I'm letting go.
I want to let go of those last things from my past that have held me captive.

3.  Seek God before contentment.
I've found myself seeking contentment above other things.  I want to feel ok with the place I'm in, but I really need to seek God.

4.  Fall back in love with God
I want to renew my love for God.


That's quite a list, but I feel every bit of that is attainable.  If you haven't done a goals list yet, I encourage you do so.

~*Melody*~

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Project 365: Day 2


Project 365: Day 2
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina

In jammies all day, not by choice but necessity. Hoping tomorrow will be better.

~*Melody*~

Friday, January 1, 2010

Project 365: Day 1


Project 365: Day 1
Originally uploaded by hibiscus_ballerina

First thing I was able to stomach in the New Year. Way to bring in 2010, huh?

~*Melody*~

My Bookshelf

Shelfari: Book reviews on your book blog
I Took The Handmade Pledge! BuyHandmade.org
The Breast Cancer Site